Situation:  I have never had any problems attracting men. I met a wonderful man, he is romantic, intelligent and everything I would possible want and need in a man. I think he is the one for me and I picture us getting married one day. This wonderful man came to this country 2 years ago and told me that he had two ex wives and 3 children. After being alone he wanted someone and thought that he might as well send for the mother of his youngest child. Of course this was before we met, but he thousands of dollars to get her here. He says he really wants to care for his son. Do I fight for him or let him go? Is it ever good to be the other woman in a man’s life?

Could be over before it really starts.

Dear Over,

I would love to sell you some prime real estate, a bridge and let’s throw in a mall, in Tahiti. There is nothing to fight over here because he is not yours. My advice would be to DROP HIM! If you have never had any problems attracting men, then you should keep it moving to the next one honey. Don’t you think you deserve a man who is wholly committed to you? I would not buy this song and dance and strongly suggest that you don’t allow yourself to be used by this man. I don’t know why you would think this man has everything you want and need unless you want to be the other woman — because that is what you would be. It is never, ever good to be the other woman. Marriage is a sacred institution and has never changed. People are the ones who do what they want to do, but the institution has never changed.

This man is fully prepared to shack up with the mother of his child and see you on the side as long as you permit it. You do know that he is going to be sleeping with her too. Don’t you know you deserve better than that? Then he sticks his son into this like he is this major concern, just for a little extra sympathy. I don’t buy it for a minute. A man who is worth anything and true to you would never put you in this situation. You deserve better than this. There are too many single, unattached men out there for you to settle for this.

Let him go and move on. Think about your sanity, safety. This man is not worth another minute of your time. Life is too short and you can find true happiness elsewhere without this drama. Keep it moving.